What kind of articles would you find in a magazine for mudsharks?

I couldn't finish this mudshark magazine cover 'cuz I can't think of any article headlines to put on the cover. Anyone got any ideas?

https://i.ibb.co/PFCM4JY/mudsharkmagazine.jpg

How about “ I fall down the stairs a lot” :lol

I'm trying to think of something Iskra Lawrence would say, but I'm eating and I don't want to look at her and her gorilla or their quadroon.
I'm sure she'd say something asinine like "Do your part, be an ally." or some stupid shit like that.

Finding your rich athlete buck

How to answer humans who hate your choice in a mate

Tips on getting child support

From one buck to another

Can't judge my choices, haters

They're just like us, really